I’m happy but I’m sad.
I’m sad but I’m happy too.
2 days ago · 0 notes
two days away,my lonely life I shall regain.so much left to gain.suppose every end’s just a new way to begin.again.
4 weeks ago · 0 notes
can’t believe how badly I get treated in return for always trying to be patient and kind.but god accommodating hasn’t been this hard.how f(star)(star)king useless and shameless and ungrateful can one be.you aren’t the only ones struggling ain’t all that bullshit part of school life.just leave me the f(star)(star)k alone and start using your own goddamn brains and learn to cope without being a burden to others but you and you alone.besides you’re the ones moving on.god knows I’ve had enough.disappointed to learn and realise the friends I’ve made thus far always ever only rely on me for things they need.conscious and unconsciously.I should never have even entertained any of it.god knows why I do.blame my idiocracy and the whole world’s too.goddd i’m as crestfallen as can be.guess the only comforting thing is knowing that the end is closer than I think it is.so cope I will.
1 month ago · 0 notes
today was off in so many ways.started out quite strange not with my usual awkwardness to be honest,I surprised myself on a social level conversing with quite a few semi strangers only less than stellar moments with familiar faces getting in the way.but then I met the loveliest strangers.one who shared her humble umbrella in the growing rain as I was waiting to cross the street on the way back home from school.and then a kind lady from a gallery I hadn’t meant to be visiting extending graciousness that was so very pleasant she turned what seemed like a disastrous day somewhat better.after walking for miles only to keep losing my way there,where I had been before.suppose it’s a sign to how things would ever be between we.went home to potential drab moments but things thankfully steered the other way and what could be more perfect than john(gingerkobayashi)cochran winning this season’s Survivor fan vs favourites first individual immunity challenge since the merge at least ending my day on a high :)
1 month ago · 1 note
I don’t want to be told by anyone no more that I should speak louder.any louder,I’m trying but that’s shouting so I won’t.no.I won’t be told.the end isn’t as lovely as how it all began.funny how far along we’ve come.all there is are traces now.of everything that used to be.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my best friend.music is my one true love.perhaps one day I’ll give it all up and busk on the streets.for no money.happy and free.
1 month ago · 0 notes
what did you learn from art school? life.
if ever one day I get to meet our creator, I’d thank him profusely for music.
1 month ago · 0 notes
quite a strong desire to be away from all things familiar.perhaps a little bit of fresh and strange is what I need to quench this yearning thirst I’ve had stirring in me since not too long ago.for what exactly I’m not sure.suppose it pains me to know that one day down the road I’d lose most you friends whose company I appreciate now for reasons I know but wouldn’t be able to explain.the act would pain me less than the thought of it though for most things,they just quietly go leaving time to cope.lately I’ve been positively low.occasionally I write about you.I haven’t in a while though.
1 month ago · 0 notes
I’d like to one day be able to say, I’m poor but I’m happy. all that I have is enough.
2 months ago · 2 notes
as much as I’ve been trying to keep really positive since this school semester started,I lost a little bit of optimism today.constructive criticisms carefully laced with kind sentences sent rather swiftly,my newfound confidence to a sinking low.so it goes.now I don’t know.again.received a text from an acquaintance I haven’t met in quite a while later in the day,the last sentence read,stay cool and cheery.that’s all I’ve ever been to many.thriving superficiality.especially when we speak.exuding positivity’s only adequate.isn’t it?perhaps too a kind of trying to accommodate in the best possible way.two semi strangers made my heart skipped a few beats the other day.made me thought of far away.someday.all that’s been are meaningless conversations.circumstance further complicates.all these felt and said,I’ve tried.I am trying.try I will.till I can find no reason to try/hold on any longer.
unsure which way to go more than ever before.but forward that’s for sure.
3 months ago · 1 note
a hopeful kind of sad
isn’t all that bad
there will be glad.
3 months ago · 3 notes
how do we live in pretense everyday.fatigue awaits.yet we do it all over again.and again and again and again.again.
3 months ago · 0 notes
something made me rather happy today.it must be the clouds.or a realisation that I’m slowly getting back to being wholesome and free.smiling’s strangely getting easy.grateful.for I haven’t lost any optimism ever since.if I do get blue.never again because of you.you asked of me he passingly said.could it be that you thought of me.which reminds me.the trees too.were lovely.the skies,a soothing shade of perfect blue.
4 months ago · 2 notes
welcomed the new year brushed my teeth,watched Boardwalk Empire back to back eating cookies and strawberry crisps hearing fireworks shot from ships from the nearby park overlooking the sea outside my window a yearly routine,trick’s getting so old it’s not even fun or funny.idiotic that when I was younger I’d thought it pathetic to not be ecstatic for the new year,the eve’s only complete if shared with a huge bunch of semi strangers you’ve just met or friends who knew where to bring you.countdown parties they’re the bees knees.never been to one still god was I darn silly.now I learnt the best way to usher a chapter of new beginnings is by being in the normalest of situations ideally alone or with the ones we love the most away from pretentious celebratory exclamated noises for what i’m not sure.don’t find it exciting at all.not anymore.tomorrow’s the same that’s for sure just a change in the way we write dates when we sign our names or something but still I’ll begin two thousand and thirteen rather hopeful.with corny resolutions of my own->don’t ever change.don’t ever hurry.don’t ever worry.not too much at least.hold on.sometimes.keep going.always.
most of all,like previous years,I hope to do and be better with each passing day.iA.
happy 2013.whatever that means whatever this year brings,here’s to new chances,new discoveries.new strength,new pain.new nothings,new somethings.new places,new faces.new highs,new lows.new hopes and longings.in short,here’s to a year of fruitfulness and opportunities,good health,adequate joy,love and peace all around.hopefully.
have a fine new year all you sweet folks.
♥ su
xo
4 months ago · 0 notes
